Today I want to talk about promises and payoffs in a story. I’ve talked around these concepts a few times, but I realized I haven’t actually dug into them by themselves. So, we’re going to discuss what promises and payoffs are, the main types, and how to use them effectively in your book.
Promises And Payoffs
Promises and payoffs are a way to set expectations for your readers and then reward them for sticking around. A promise is any time you set something up so the reader expects something to follow. If you start a story by telling the audience a character will die, then he better die before the end (Disney’s Tangled). Opening a story in a spaceship means the story is science fiction so you’ll have to deliver on the genre expectations. If a girl meets a boy at the beginning of a romance book, they need to end up together before the end. These are all expectations you set for your readers. They are things you promise they’ll see if they stick around.
Payoffs are the fulfillment of those promised expectations. They are little rewards for the readers for trusting you enough to read your book. If you promise something and then don’t deliver, chances are you won’t have any repeat customers. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to do everything your reader expects. In Tangled, we are told Flynn will die, and he does. But (spoiler alert!) he comes back to life. The promise was fulfilled but with a surprising twist (okay, maybe not so surprising for a Disney movie, but you get the idea).
When you are writing, don’t draw attention to anything that won’t have a purpose later in the story. For example, if you spend a paragraph describing the panels of a wood floor, there better be a trap door under it or something. Readers are trained to think everything in a story has a purpose. If it isn’t important for the plot, don’t bring attention to it.
Types Of Promises And Payoffs
Pretty much anything can be a promise to your readers, but there are four major types you can make and fulfill. When writing promises and payoffs, keep in mind these parts of your book: tone, genre, plot, and character.
1. Tone
An overall promise you will make in your book’s opening is the tone. Will it by funny? Poetic? Adventurous? You need to start with the tone that your readers will experience throughout the book. If you start with a comical romance scene and then launch into a gritty horror story, you’ll have a lot of unhappy readers. Those who bought the book will expect a cute romance and not get it, and the readers who’d love your horror story will never see it. Make sure your opening scene is a taste of what the whole book will include so you reach your ideal audience.
2. Genre
Another overall promise for your book will be genre. The title and book cover will help set these expectations, but you need to start your book with a healthy dose of your genre indicators. Consider about your word choice and your setting, and make sure it fits your genre. If I say vampires, you think fantasy. If I say crime scene, you think mystery (or maybe thriller). A small town covered in a haze could be the opening of a horror story, but a town with rows of sunflowers could be a romance. Think about the little details you can use to signal to your readers what type of story they are about to ready, and use them to subtly hint at your genre in the opening scene.
3. Plot
Plot is a type of promise you will be making over and over again. You’ll have an overall plot promise: murder mystery, going on a quest, attending wizard school, etc. Then you show progress, conflict, and shifts in regards to that promise. That main story line isn’t the only plot promise though. You’ll make multiple all throughout the story.
Each scene you write needs to have a promise and a payoff in it. Set the readers expectations for each scene by giving the protagonist a goal. If the girl needs to avoid bullies at school, then show her progressing toward that goal. What does she do to avoid them? Does she run into them anyway? She should. Her goal is to avoid bullies, but the promise to the readers was that there are bullies. We need to see them.
Now, the payoff doesn’t always have to be in the same scene as the promise. You can have a clue in one scene, but not know what it means until three scenes later. But, even if you don’t give a payoff on the current promise, you need to give the readers some reward in each scene. You can do a payoff from a previous promise in another scene, but the readers should leave every scene with new information or the climax of some expected situation (like running into the bullies).
4. Character
The last type of promise and payoff is in character development. You’ll introduce the protagonist in a way that shows what kind of person the reader can expect to spend time with in the book. Are they funny? Rebellious? Optimistic? Your character can have ups and downs, but the character’s personality should remain consistent. I know some people who love a protagonist who is an underdog; others want to follow someone who is too smart for his own good. Make sure you make accurate promises about what kind of person the protagonist is and then fulfill payoffs by keeping that consistent.
The character’s internal journey will also be a promise to the readers. There is an expectation that the protagonist will learn things they need for the end of the book. If they spend time learning archery, then they must need it by the end of the book. If they study spells for school, then they’ll use those spells. Beyond just skills though, the protagonist will learn lessons about themselves. Maybe they aren’t courageous, but by the end they will learn to be brave. Or perhaps a person will start out selfish and turn into one who puts others first. Just remember, if you draw attention to something about the character or their outlook, it needs to have a payoff in the story.
Examples
I always find things are easier to grasp when you see it in action. So, let’s look at two examples of how a book starts with its promises.
The Lightning Thief
Our first example is The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan. Here is its first few sentences.
“Look, I didn’t want to be a half-blood. If you’re reading this because you think you might be one, my advice is: close this book right now. Believe whatever lie your mom or dad told you about your birth, and try to lead a normal life. Being a half-blood is dangerous. It’s scary. Most of the time, it gets you killed in painful, nasty ways.”
The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan
Right off the bat, we have a conversational tone. Rick shows up front that our protagonist is going to break the fourth wall with readers. Lots of people don’t like that kind of storytelling so it’s great to show them at the start. We also have words like dangerous, scary, and painful. There are obvious hints that this book has a conversational tone, but some darker elements may exist. Rick does a great job getting all those promises in the first few lines so readers know what tone to expect for the book.
Next, we see a genre clue: half-blood. We don’t know what that is, but we can guess it’s part of a fantasy world. The protagonist also references a “normal life,” which makes us believe his isn’t normal. Another sign of a fantasy genre. We also know the protagonist references parents, meaning we have a middle grade or young adult book.
The plot isn’t on the page yet, but we have some clear indicators it’s an adventure plot. The protagonist says his life is scary, dangerous, and could get him killed in nasty ways. That promises the reader action scenes: fights, life-or-death stakes, and probably some cruel villains. Rick is signposting that if you’re looking for a romance story, this book isn’t for you.
Last we have a promise about the protagonist: he’s a reluctant hero. He didn’t ask to be in this world, but he is there anyway. A little later down on the first page, he admits he might be classified as a “troubled kid.” So, he’s probably an outcast, misunderstood. The readers quickly get the idea that the protagonist is an underdog thrust into a dangerous world.
The Name Of The Wind
Now let’s look at a book that offers very different promises to the readers. Here are the opening lines to The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss.
“It was night again. The Waystone Inn lay in silence, and it was a silence of three parts.”
The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss
Patrick only needs two sentences to set the tone for the book. Night and silence: an eerie tone. Readers are in for dark themes. Silence of three parts: deep and poetic. The readers immediately know they are about to read a book that makes them think, a book where each sentence is a work of art on its own.
The genre is harder to pick up in two lines, but any fantasy reader will see it immediately. Waystone Inn is a classic fantasy name for an inn (or pub) in an epic fantasy. If that isn’t clear enough though, Patrick works in beings like demons and Chandrian later to show a fantastical world.
Since Patrick wanted a poetic tone to his book, he doesn’t launch immediately into plot. However, the first scene we see is about a group of men listening to a story in the inn. The story references adventure, danger, Chandrian, the magic of knowing names, and other little tidbits that become major parts of the overall book. The story is also interrupted by a man stumbling inside, and he’s covered in blood. The readers now know that the storyteller isn’t just spinning fiction. There are dark things roaming and killing people. Readers keep reading because they expect a plot of adventure, danger, and magic. Patrick gives them payoffs on all of the above.
When it comes to character promises, Patrick gives us a mystery. Our protagonist is portrayed as a man who knows more than he should. He seems to have been through some tragedy and knows magic stronger than anyone else. The promise is that, if the readers stick around, they’ll discover how the mysterious protagonist became so powerful and what happened to him.
How To Know If You Did It Right
There are two ways to make sure you make the right promises and give payoffs. First, you can check the start and end of the book and each individual scene. Ask yourself, what promises did I make to the reader? Did I payoff on those promises in this book? You’ll have some promises that start at the beginning and don’t pay off until the climax, and then there will be those that are made and fulfilled in the same scene. Make sure you didn’t drop any promise part way through. If you did, ask yourself if you can delete the promise or if you must keep it and find a way to create the payoff.
The second way to check that your promises and payoffs work is to have beta readers. You know the story so you may miss something. Someone with fresh eyes will see things differently than you. Your beta readers may say the story isn’t satisfying. That will probably be because you made the wrong promises that don’t match your payoffs. If the reader thought it was a story about the boy and girl but it’s really about the boy and his race car, the big racing competition at the climax will feel empty to the reader. Often, if you present the promises wrong, the readers will feel like the main story is really a side story, and they’ll stop caring. If you tell them the boy wants to get the girl, then they will be looking for that plot line and be bored when you spend scene after scene with the boy fixing up and testing his race car. Use beta readers to see what expectations they have at the beginning, and compare those expectations to what happens at the end of your book. If they don’t match, then you have your promises and payoffs wrong.
Final Thoughts
When I’m writing, I often like to start by picking my payoffs. What is the big event I want as a climax? What lesson do I want my protagonist to learn? How do I want readers to feel when they read the book? Once I’ve set the payoffs, I look at how I can start the book to make promises that lead to those payoffs. If I want a big sword fight climax, then I need to start with a fight or action scene. If I want two friends to reconcile their differences to win the day, then I need to show the power of friendship and teamwork at the beginning. Your opening should hint at the climax of your book, just on a smaller scale. Then you’ll hook the right readers with your promises, and they’ll love spending the book watching the protagonist’s progress until the final payoff arrives.
Thanks for reading!
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